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Writer's pictureShakti Sundari

THE MIND IS THE BIGGEST BARRIER TO PLEASURE


People often think, that when sex isn't as great as they'd love it to be, that there's something "wrong" with their genitals, their partner/themselves or their technique.


True, if you cultivate embodied awareness and approach love-making tantrically, that will vastly enhance your experience.


And the connection and communication between you and your partner are of vital importance. Which is a mutual responsibility.


But the biggest barrier to pleasure is the mind.


Thinking diverts you from feeling and presence-ing.


"Do I look fat?"


"Am I doing it wrong?"


"What if I lose my erection?"


"Does she like it?"


"What shall I make for packed lunches tomorrow?"


"Wonder what my stocks are doing?"


Just a few examples of in-the-moment thoughts that obscure intimacy.


Because it's impossible to sense your body and connect with your partner, when you're up in your head and casting your attention anywhere but now.


On top of this, most people are moving and responding from a conglomeration of thoughts called beliefs, that not only shape their bodies, but their turn-on.


Let's take Numero Uno for example: SHAME.


Rooted in all those stories we've heard since childhood, that sex, desire and the body are dirty and sinful.


A narrative that locks up the pelvis, tightens the arse, constricts the throat, inhibits free self-expression and armours the heart.


Not exactly a recipe for RAPTURE is it?


And which is why, contrary to the orgiastic free-for-all many assume tantra to be, it's a MEDITATIVE practice, that cultivates a state of no-mind.


The less mind you take into the bedroom with you, the more profound your ecstasy will be.


So, if you're keen to enhance your sexual experience, whether woman or man, devote yourself to practices of stillness and you're already halfway there.


I host a monthly online TANTRIC TEMPLE for women & men, where I will guide you in practices and meditations and be there to answer your questions about how to deepen in awakened intimacy.


7-9pm GMT. Live on Zoom. Investment: £30


(Next one Wednesday, March 9th,7 -9pm GMT)


NB. No nudity. Singles and couples welcome. REGISTER HERE.

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