There can be a lot of blame and shame talk about men and their sexual shadow.
And it's understandable, when there is a history of so much sexual violence towards women, that passions are stirred.
BUT, women have a sexual shadow too.
So, satisfying to the wounded self as it may be, it's false to assume, that the "fault" only lies with one half of the population.
A big part of my work involves supporting women to recognise their own shadow behaviours, so that they may be free and their relating upgraded.
Illuminating the shadow feminine is a critical part of sexual and spiritual awakening.
To become truly sovereign in this arena - and hence our lives - we are called to get radically honest about our own murkiness.
Which, much as some may protest, we ALL have.
If you live in the world, you will inevitably be conditioned to hold beliefs about men, women and sex that are not truths.
And you will inevitably have had experiences that affect the way you now perceive men, women and sex.
And all of this will affect how you now think, feel and behave. Including who you fancy, how you flirt and what turns you on.
Your behaviour is neither neutral nor innocent. It is coloured by your past and infused with both your and the collective unconscious.
Which will typically reinforce fixed ideas and roles, that are not congruent with your authentic, ecstatic nature.
In fact, as I say in my book, RAPTURE, "everything you've been taught is a lie."
When you commit to the path of awakening, all that was once in the dark (ie. unseen by you) rises into awareness.
Giving you the opportunity to take full and conscious responsibility for how you date, mate and relate.
Changing and elevating sex relations.
Ditching centuries of patriarchal influence.
Shifting ancestral karmic storylines.
No more looking outside yourself to source your happiness, self-worth or turn-on. It starts and ends with you.
An invitation, that's too confronting for some, but essential and unavoidable for those seeking soul growth and liberation.
As synchronicity has it, last night's Full Moon in Scorpio highlighted the feminine sexual shadow.
And wouldn't you know, one of the cards our beloved Bayari Lou Beegan drew was the "Femme Fatale".
She who, in her light, is utterly at ease in her erotic expression. But in her dark uses her sexual wiles to seduce and manipulate.
An archetype some might say is perfectly exemplified right now by Hollyood actress Amber Heard.
In my upcoming SOVEREIGN SEXUAL WOMAN Retreat, we take a look at the way in which we have been playing out this and other such archetypes.
Not because we're bad bad women, but because we want to own our desire, reclaim our power and embody our sexual energy with integrity and awareness.
Discovering, that when we act from the shadows, then we'll attract the same in return. So there's no-one to blame but us.
Are you open to taking a look?
Unearthing your own femme fatale in both her dark and her light?
Or maybe, for you it's the prostitute or the prude?
What? You don't like the word "prostitute"? Fair enough, but please enquire within: have you ever used your body or sexuality to get or trade for something? That's prostitution by another name.
Harsh I know, but a spade's a spade. And shadow-hunting demands our penetrating honesty.
There are plenty more where these came from. And once we get going, it's actually fun.
We get to laugh at and with these shadow aspects as we embody them. Trying them on like costumes. Discovering how they move and shape us. Disarming them as we en-lighten ourselves.
And by the end of it, there we are - fresh-faced, lit up, real and raw. Shining.
My SOVEREIGN SEXUAL WOMAN Retreat is an in-person event for just 12 wondrous women. Here in Hampstead, London. Over the weekend of June 18-19th, 2022. Investment: £222 on/before May 31. Then £333. Reach out with questions.
I'd love to welcome you !
Note: This card is drawn from Caroline Myss' "Archetypes" deck.